Even when everything is going great, seeing a couples therapist can be so beneficial to your relationship!
My husband and I started seeing a couples therapist years ago after we had been dating for a while. Becoming a blended family and dealing with his ex-wife was taking a serious toll on our relationship. We would argue about the littlest things, how to deal with her insanity and just focus on us and our kids and we needed someone who could be the middle person between us.
We knew that the amount of love we had for each other was worth every ounce of fight we had in us to keep moving towards each other instead of apart. My husband and I chose to start seeing a couples therapist for the sake of our relationship and it honestly saved us.
People almost always seem afraid to talk about therapy and talking about needing help. We totally get it! Did we go around telling everyone that we were seeing a therapist? No. Did we feel ashamed? Honestly, at first… a little bit. But, why should we feel ashamed for something that helps us?
Every couple goes through their ups and their downs. They go through moments of great passion and moments of hate and pain. Believe me, we have had ours and honestly, I am so happy we did. In the moment, it was hard but the pain and hardships we have gone through led us to being the strong couple we are today.
We chose to continue seeing our therapist once a month just to keep us connected, to keep the communication flowing and allow us to continue to grow together. We definitely still have a lot of stress (Hello 4 kids! Coronavirus! Ex’s! Money!) and we do not want to lose ourselves as a couple.
“I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you” – Roy Croft
We have always made promises to each other that we would never give up in continuing to grow our relationship and when you love someone enough, you will do whatever you have to.
Seeing our therapist really allows for us to talk about things that we honestly forgot about or didn’t really think was an issue for one of us. When you start getting asked specific questions, it makes you think about those little moments more. It releases things you were holding in without even knowing that you had those little moments bottled up.
READ THAT AGAIN.
SIX YEARS? WHY?
That truly blows my mind. Why would you wait even a month of being unhappy with your significant other without getting help? Without taking that step into becoming happy again? Why would you want to waste so many years of holding onto resentment and pain before you really take that leap to fixing whatever it was that pulled you both apart?
If you love your significant other then your relationship is worth every ounce of fight you have inside you. Talking to someone who is a neutral party allows for you both to open up and have someone who will be able to steer the conversation to be productive and instead of adding to the pain, anger, betrayal or whatever other negative emotions they will show and teach you how to get through it, how to talk through it, and how to truly grow with your significant other instead of apart.
We love knowing that when we go through a difficult time, we created the resources to be able to get through it strong and that we have a neutral person to remain the middle man and keep us grounded.
Want to learn more about how we keep our relationship strong and steady? Check out our post we wrote together here!
If you and your spouse need any help, start searching for a therapist here! Never wait to ask for help.